Growing Up in a Rainstorm

When I walked out of church this morning, I had an old, familiar feeling come across me. A thunderstorm. The skies were gray, just waiting to open up. No sooner had I reached my car than it started to pour, accompanied by lightening and thunder. Glorious! I love a good thunderstorm.

One of the truly great pleasures in this world is to experience a summer thunderstorm in the Midwest. God's world comes alive in a new way. I have some very simple, yet great memories that are triggered by thunderstorms. Playing outside in the rain on several different occasions. Sitting in my house growing up, eating pizza and watching a movie with the fam while rain absolutely pounded the roof. So loud that we had to turn the volume up on the TV for a bit. Getting into my tent after a long hike in the rain, stripping out of my wet clothes, and taking the most glorious 3-hour nap I've ever had, with the rain pounding down on my rainfly. Yep, many great memories are triggered by thunderstorms. I had myself a pretty great nap today during a storm, as a matter of fact.

In some ways, thunderstorms represent something familiar to me. They come, they go. Each one unique, yet the same. Violent and unsettling, yet beautiful and necessary. I realize blogging about weather isn't exactly the most interesting and profound thing to blog about. I think it just dawned on me sitting here that I've been in the middle of a thunderstorm of sorts for a while, but I'm now just coming to grips with what I have to do.

When we are babies and toddlers, we have an innate instinct to make sure our parents are close by as we explore the world. As we continue to grow, we want to make sure our parents are proud of us. In many ways, I think this holds for ever and ever. As we explore, and seek to please, we are at the same time trying to establish our own identity. I was with my friend Kristin and her two kids. Her youngest is almost two years old, and found of saying "I do it" when she wants to try things herself. I think we all continue to say this, while still looking for that safety net in case we fall. Every time we succeed in our "I do it" moments, we build confidence to try new things. Every time we fall into our safety net, we receive comfort for our fall, and are encouraged to try again. To continue to grow.

Unfortunately, as we grow older (and in the saddest of situations, some kids never have a reliable safety net), sometimes we don't have access to a safety net. Or we think we don't. That's satan at work, no doubt. God is the ultimate safety net, even if we choose to try and explore our lives without him. We must seek out that safety net. But perhaps equally important, I think we have to faithfully "try again" after God catches us.

These thoughts really just swept over me today. I think I've got some exploring of the world in store, but I've been scared to do it. I keep holding on to safety nets, not even willing to see how much I can do. I'm not sure this glorifies God. Actually, I'm pretty sure it doesn't.

I've had the chance to look in the mirror a lot lately. Both literally and figuratively. Personally and professionally. That might sound a bit cliche. So be it. I have. Unfortunately, I think I let satan into my self-reflection times way too much. I had a chance to look in the mirror today at church, and liked what I saw. Vain? Lol. No. But it sure was nice to do that.

When I look in the mirror professionally, I think I've had some new realizations. It's time to step up. I think in some ways I've tried to stay too close to my safety nets. Or maybe I've just expected too much from safety nets. God has tremendously blessed me with my work. It's time to strive for my potential. Especially now, since things have been pretty stormy for me professionally the last couple of years. This is scary and exciting all the same.

In keeping with my theme, here is my music for the moment. I often get into ruts with my music, listening to the same song/artist until I grind it straight into the ground. But I came across this video from one of my favorite, recent movies, Juno. Great version of this song. Soak it up, this is quality.